


Bad Boys (Watcha Gonna Do)

by t_dragon



Category: EXO (Band), Red Velvet (K-pop Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Spies & Secret Agents, Conspiracy, Crack, M/M, Mercenaries, Sassy Byun Baekhyun
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-27
Updated: 2019-02-27
Packaged: 2019-11-06 04:19:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,082
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17932709
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/t_dragon/pseuds/t_dragon
Summary: Mercenary Byun Baekhyun accepts a job offer with a secret strike team and is consequently dragged into a spiral of various events leading straight to the heart of an intricate conspiracy plot. On the way, he encounters both demons from his past, as well as builds new relationships.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [lovelyairi](https://archiveofourown.org/users/lovelyairi/gifts).



> HAPPY BIRTHDAY BABY! I know you most probably won't be able to read this for a little while, but I still wanted to post it for you on your birthday, because YOU DESERVE THAT! I hope you'll enjoy this, but since it has sassy Baekhyun and bff!Kyungsoo (as well as some other hidden things, ohoho!) I have a feeling you will!  
> And yes, you might recognize at least one part of this...? Something about tight shirts I might have sent you in the past...?  
> (Yes, the title comes from the song, it's stupid af - perfect for this fic!)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> No fires are too hot for Baekhyun to handle

 “Oh, fuck… Shit, shit, shit!” Baekhyun hissed, scrambling to get up on his feet. “Hot, too hot, why do I always end up in the fire?!”

 Of course there was no one to answer him, but Baekhyun did not need anyone to answer him either. He knew why, of course he knew. He had a tendency to throw himself into shit like this, and no real interest in breaking the habit. The fire was hot, but it was a fucking blast!

 And the fire was a very  _ big _ blast at the moment, so Baekhyun really needed to get a move on and get out of this building, before he had a bit  _ too _ much fun and got swallowed by the inferno as well.

 “I mean, sure, I’d always intended to go out with the biggest bang humanly possible, but I still have so much left to do, so much left to see!” Baekhyun muttered to himself as he sped down corridors, trying to remember the way out. “I’m too young to die!”

 All around him, people were running as well, panic overwhelming in the air, but Baekhyun did not pay them much mind. They really should put that in the description for the ‘scientist for evil laboratory’ job ad - involves somewhat of a risk of getting caught in the middle of a firefight, possibly even encountering a bomb blast. But Baekhyun guessed that did not pull as many in, and we could not have a shortage of evil lab scientists working on morally ambiguous experiments, no sir!

 After all, that would mean Baekhyun being out of a job, and Baekhyun liked having jobs! They resulted in money, and money bought Baekhyun many pretty, nice things, so Baekhyun liked evil lab scientists!

 “Out of my way!” Baekhyun yelled as he tore down yet another corridor. Did they never end? “Head for exists, you idiots!”

 Finally,  _ finally, _ Baekhyun slammed through a pair of doors and tasted the sweet smell of fresh air - polluted and smokey and all that goodness that came from the industrial area of a large city. Lovely!

 Slowing down to a jog, Baekhyun spun around and moved backwards as he kept his eyes on the building. People were swarming out of it, terrified, but Baekhyun was excitedly waiting for the  _ boom. _

 And when the  _ boom _ went off, the blast threw Baekhyun backwards, doing an unwilling somersault before coming to a stop on his belly, face down into the ground.

 “Oh, ouch…,” Baekhyun groaned, coughing in the dust settling around him. “Should’ve run faster…”

 “Yeah, probably, but the flopping looked rather fun. For me at least.”

 Stiffening, Baekhyun glanced to the side, getting an eyeful of combat boots and camo pants. Rolling onto his side, Baekhyun quickly got up on his feet, crouched down as he took in the man in front of him.

 Thick, long limbs of  _ magnificent _ power, light golden skin stretched over taut muscles, all topped off with a surprisingly cute face and messy red hair.  _ Oh, yum! _

 “Who the hell are you?” Baekhyun muttered, a bit pissed that he had been caught in such a compromising situation by such a hottie. And he had seen Baekhyun’s fall? Fuck!

 “Nobody you need to worry yourself about,” the hottie said, voice deliciously deep and this sexy little half-smile on his lips that made Baekhyun’s knees feel a bit weak.

 “Uh, why does it feel like that’s a big, fat lie, my dude?” Baekhyun deadpanned, motioning towards the hottie with one hand. “You know, the army outfit really gets my spidey senses tingling!”

 “Charming,” hottie snorted, gaze going to somewhere above and behind Baekhyun.

 Of course.

 “Ah, fucking hell…,” Baekhyun groaned, rolling his eyes, before the blow landed at the back of his head, and he was knocked out.

 Not completely, though, Baekhyun was still awake enough to feel himself get dragged towards what looked like a blurry vehicle of some sort, before rather carelessly getting thrown into the back of it.

 “Rude motherfuckers, I’m injured,” Baekhyun mumbled, pretty sure he was slurring his words too much to actually be making sense, but fuck it.

 “Geez, he’s still awake? How the fuck?”

 “Guess you didn’t hit him hard enough. Whatever, he seems pretty out of it, just cuff him for now. As long as he’s incapacitated in some form, it doesn’t matter.”

 “Kinky motherfuckers,” Baekhyun chuckled, feeling the cold steel against his wrists before blacking out completely.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> No handcuffs can hold Baekhyun

 It was with a long, drawn-out groan that Baekhyun came to again, pain radiating out from the back of his head, echoing in time with his heartbeat.

 “Ah, shit, what happened to the good ol’ tranq darts?” Baekhyun complained into the air, not having found the motivation to open his eyes just yet. He kind of wanted to wait until his head was not spinning quite as much, not really wanting to puke his guts out right now.

 “Tranq darts are for far away, we were able to get up close. Sloppy.”

 “Oh, no, you’re here…,” Baekhyun groaned, trying to roll over onto his side to get away from the delicious voice - but realizing that he was unable to get _anywhere_ , considering the fact that he seemed to be handcuffed to a fucking table. “A table, really? This how you treat your prisoners? Rude!”

 “Safety precaution.”

 As the world started to slow down, Baekhyun lethargically blinked his eyes open. Across from him sat the redhead hottie, leaned back in his chair with his arms crossed over his chest, _perfectly_ accentuating his guns. _Ugh, how obnoxious. Hot, but obnoxious._

 “Safety precaution? You knocked me out with a hit to the back of my head, how much damage could little ol’ me do right now, do you think?” Baekhyun asked innocently, jutting his lower lip out in a small pout.

 “Enough for me to chain you to the table as precaution,” the redhead hottie answered, smiling rather sweetly, and Baekhyun’s pout deepened.

 “But you’re so strong, so big and tall and _massive_ , I could _never_ take you down!” Baekhyun continued, smearing it on strong, maybe too strong, but whatever.

 The hottie burst out laughing, a kind of dorky, almost-cute sound that went straight to Baekhyun’s heart like holy shit what even.

 “I know who you are, Byun Baekhyun, so don’t even try,” redhead hottie said, making Baekhyun purse his lips, pout disappearing. “I didn’t even make it through your entire file thanks to how thick it is!”

 “Not thicker than my dick, though,” Baekhyun smirked, leaning back in his chair as he skipped the innocent act - it was not working anyway.

 And lo and behold, that comment got him reddening ears, how adorable!

 “Somehow I doubt that, your file is really thick…,” redhead _cutie_ mumbled, a bit thrown off now, and Baekhyun was _living_.

 “Wanna find out, baby boy?” Baekhyun asked, smirk widening just as much as redhead cutie’s eyes.

 Before the other had a chance to say anything, or even stutter, the door was opened, and another man stepped inside. This one was dressed in dress pants and a shirt, sleeves rolled up to expose sinewy forearms.

 “Ah, you’re awake, good,” the man said, more focused on the papers in his hands than Baekhyun, and Baekhyun pouted at the lack of attention. “My name’s Kim Junmyeon, and I’m the person in charge of this operation. You must be wondering where you are and why you’re here-”

 “I’m here because you want to recruit me,” Baekhyun said in a bored tone, interrupting this _Kim Junmyeon_ without too much care. _They_ had interrupter _him_ first, after all, by knocking him out! “Not my first rodeo, sweetcheeks, though I have to say that so far, this is the _best-looking_ team I’ve seen…”

 Kim Junmyeon glanced up at Baekhyun with a raised eyebrow, and Baekhyun answered it with a cheeky grin.

 “Well, then, no need for any lengthy explanations…,” Kim Junmyeon said, dropping his papers on top of the table as redhead cutie got up from the chair and moved to lean against the wall instead. Baekhyun was _almost_ sad to see him go, but he looked pretty good against the wall, so Baekhyun did not mind too much. Walls really were great… “Yes, we’re looking to recruit you, for a very important mission.”

 “Saving the world? That’s ambitious,” Baekhyun drawled.

 Kim Junmyeon chuckled, a small smile on his lips. “It _is_ , and we’re not aiming for saving the world. Saving the country is big enough for us.”

 Baekhyun tilted his head to the side, lips rounded around an ‘oh’.

 “Well, that one’s new, normally all the teams aim really big,” Baekhyun said, lithe fingers dancing across the steel wrapped around his wrists. “But I agree with you guys, saving the country is big enough! Patriotism, and all that!”

 Redhead cutie snorted from where he was standing, and Baekhyun turned his eyes to him with a small grin.

 “Excuse you, baby boy, have anything to say?”

 Redhead cutie raised an eyebrow, glancing at Kim Junmyeon, before his eyes went back to Baekhyun.

 “What do _you_ know about patriotism?” redhead cutie asked, the sarcasm in his voice making it seem more like a statement than a question. “You’re a mercenary, taking whatever job is the highest paid, do you even have any morals? There’s no patriotism in that!”

 Baekhyun had to grit his teeth at that.

 “You really should’ve taken the time to read through my file, hot sauce, and read between the lines,” Baekhyun mocked, a tiny prick of annoyance in his heart that he tried to ignore. This was not the first time, after all, but it had gotten a bit old by now… “But maybe you’re all brawn and no brains… You certainly look like it.”

 “The pattern really isn’t as discernable as you think it is, Baekhyun…,” Kim Junmyeon mumbled, and Baekhyun shot him a bored look. He was looking at his papers again. What were they saying about Baekhyun? “You were a bit more… _Open_ to all kinds of jobs before, and it’s only recently that you can notice a big change. You can’t really fault Phoenix for not seeing it. There really is a lot to get through in your file, and it’s not like it’s screaming patriotism either. I’d say that it looks more like you actually having a conscience and acting after it, but what do I know…”

 “Phoenix?” Baekhyun asked, of course latching onto that little piece of information. Eyes going to the flaming mop of hair on top of redhead cutie’s head, Baekhyun snickered. “Ah, I see, _the hair_. Must be a bitch to maintain just for a codename.”

 “If you want to avoid the subject, fine by me,” Kim Junmyeon said with another one of his small smiles, and Baekhyun was growing rather annoyed with them. They seemed so judgy! “The only subject we really need to discuss is the recruitment offer.”

 “Ah, yes, the recruitment offer… I’m still a bit fuzzy on the details, I have to say, like why the need to handcuff me to a table if you want me to work with you? Not really building any trust here, buddy!” Baekhyun said, fingers still working over the metal.

 Kim Junmyeon put his papers down again and shrugged. “Precaution, to make sure you hopefully wouldn’t do too much damage before we had the chance to talk to you and make our offer. Of course I never expected them to hold for long, but maybe _long enough_.”

 Phoenix frowned and pushed off of the wall, and the expression was surprisingly hot, but Baekhyun mostly ignored that for now. Hopefully he would have the time to lure it out later again, and take advantage of it a bit more.

 “Somebody has done their homework,” Baekhyun said, a wicked grin on his lips as the cuffs clicked and slid apart, slipping from around his wrists to clank against the table. “What a good boy.”

 “I like being prepared,” Kim Junmyeon responded, and there was an edge to his smile now that Baekhyun could appreciate. Huh. This was getting more and more interesting…

 Phoenix was obviously not on the same page as everyone else in the room, as he hurried over to the table and gripped the handcuffs, as if they could tell him what the fuck had just happened.

 “Wha- How did you get out of the cuffs?!” he spluttered, shock so very obvious on his face, confusion and frustration coloring his face a few shades closer to his hair color.

 “For real, my file can probably be a very good read for you, my little raspberry,” Baekhyun said, clicking his tongue as he shook his head. “Though I have to say, probably one of the hardest pairs of cuffs I’ve tried to get out of so far. Normally I take not even half of the time to get out, so props to that!”

 Phoenix was still glancing between the cuffs and Baekhyun, mumbling “I don’t understand…” under his breath, and Baekhyun wanted to reach out and pat his head and coo.

 “It is impressive, I have to say,” Kim Junmyeon said, bringing the attention back to him. “But there’s a reason for why I chose _you_ , Baekhyun. You’re good, very good, at what you do, and I have reason to believe that that’s exactly what we need.”

 Propping his chin on his hand, elbow on the table, Baekhyun leaned forwards and sighed. “But you’re not going to tell me what we’re going to do yet, right?”

 “Precisely,” Kim Junmyeon said, smile on his face. “Precautions. And I’d rather give details when I have details to give. Don’t want to give information that might turn out to be false, but I think you can understand that.”

 “Yeah, sure, I get it, is fine, just tell me what to do for now then,” Baekhyun said, eyes sliding towards the still slightly shell-shocked looking Phoenix, smirk spreading on his lips.

 “Not him,” Kim Junmyeon clarified, pointing this kind of stern dad-look at Baekhyun. “Be kind to him.”

 “ _Boring_ , but okay, dad,” Baekhyun said with a small pout, just as Phoenix looked up to glance between them, eyes suspiciously narrowed.

 “You’re talking about me, aren’t you? I agree, no me, down boy!” Phoenix ordered, pointing at Baekhyun and looking like he was chastising a child or a _dog_ or something.

 “Oh, baby boy, I’m all game for puppy play, don’t encourage me like that!” Baekhyun purred, sending the now blushing Phoenix a wink, before dropping the amused expression for a grimace. “Sorry, you’re kinda pushing all of my buttons, activating all the systems… I’ll try to hold myself back!”

 “Good, because Phoenix will take you on a tour around the base now, to show you the place,” Kim Junmyeon said with another one of his smiles, grabbing his papers and knocking them repeatedly against the table to right them before standing up. “Behave, Baekhyun, and I’ll see you later!”

 With that, Kim Junmyeon was out the door, before Phoenix could gather himself and stutter something out, and they were left in silence after the door closed.

 “So,” Baekhyun finally said, grinning up at a wide-eyes Phoenix. “Oh, calm down, I won’t bite you unless you give explicit permission! Let’s get this tour going?”

 “Ah, y-yes,” Phoenix said, clearing his throat and seemingly gathering himself. “Come on, let’s go.”

 Standing up, Baekhyun cheerfully marched over to where Phoenix was standing, grinning up at him. “Show me the way, then, waffles!”

 Phoenix stared at Baekhyun for a moment, before turning and heading outside, Baekhyun following.

 

 The tour was rather brief, considering the compound not being the biggest, but they seemed to pack the needed stuff. Not the most impressive place, Baekhyun had been inside of flashier places, had  _ blown up _ flashier places, but this one was not too bad. Almost homey, actually!

 “If you have any questions, just let me know,” Phoenix said as they were walking past several conference rooms. The more boring part of the place, but unfortunately conference rooms were kind of needed for briefings and debriefings and… Other stuff. Baekhyun really did not know what happened in conference room, but he knew they were important!

 “I got one question,” Baekhyun said, stretching a hand into the air like the good boy he was.

 Phoenix cocked an eyebrow, but motioned for Baekhyun to continue.

 “So, are the tiddie-tight shirts with the nips a requirement, or…?” Baekhyun asked, using his raised hand to instead point straight at Phoenix’s chest. His very well-sculpted and yummy chest…

 Glancing down, red bloomed across Phoenix’s cheeks, and he crossed his arms  _ very _ inconspicuously over his chest, and really, how could Baekhyun  _ not _ grin wolfishly at that? Phoenix was like a lamb, so soft and innocent, and Baekhyun wanted to  _ devour _ .

 “No, you get them after you manage to actually lift some,” a new voice said, and with a small smile, Baekhyun turned his head to face the newcomer. Another tall boy, this one with bleached blonde hair. Was height some kind of requirement here? Then what the fuck was Baekhyun doing here? “You know, to get some muscle mass?”

 “Oh, would you look at that, pretty boy got some bite!” Baekhyun smirked, tilting his head and blinking innocently. “Or is it all just bark?”

 “Don’t even try, kid, you can’t handle me,” flower boy said, crossing his arms over his chest, and Baekhyun duly noted the guns. Not as massive as Phoenix’s, but nothing to laugh at either. “Come back in a hundred years, and then we’ll see if you can keep up.”

 “Cute, I think I like you…,” Baekhyun chuckled, tapping a finger against his chin in thought. “So far you certainly spar better than baby boy here, but chill a bit on all of the assumptions, ‘kay? No fun in that, take me for a test drive before you make a decision!”

 A perfect eyebrow raised high on flower boy’s forehead, as if he was surprised. Baekhyun liked surprising people, it normally got him funny reactions - though flower boy’s was a bit lacking, Baekhyun had to say…

 “Zephyr, this is Byun Baekhyun,” Phoenix said, voice barely more than a mumble, and Baekhyun bristled a little.

 “What, so everyone’s going to codename on me, while y’all get to know  _ my _ name? Isn’t that a bit unfair?” Baekhyun protested, turning to Phoenix with his arms crossed over his chest.

 But Phoenix merely shrugged. “We’ve been a team for a long time now, gotten to know each other, and you’re the new guy. Gotta earn the respect before you earn the names.”

 “Don’t worry, Baekhyunnie, if you’re half as good as I’ve heard, it won’t take you long to start collecting names,” Zephyr said, a small smirk on his lips.

 “Baekhyunnie?” Baekhyun asked as he turned, eyes narrowed and lips pursed. “Slow down there, flower boy, no name, no terms of endearments, you gotta earn that, too.”

 “Baekhyun’s also older, but what does that matter, really,” Phoenix breathed, and it was only the fact that Baekhyun actually heard him that let Baekhyun know that he had been  _ meant _ to hear it. It was said  _ just _ loud enough, and a grin slowly spread on Baekhyun’s lips as Zephyr’s eyes widened in shock. Probably the most feeling Baekhyun had seen on his face so far. Fun!

 “What?! No way, he can’t be older than me, look at him! He’s so tiny!” Zephyr protested, motioning towards Baekhyun, and without meaning to Baekhyun looked down at himself with a frown.

 Did he really look that tiny? Sure, the oversized sweater was probably not helping, neither were the baggy pants, but he had dressed for comfort, not to impress! He had been out on a mission, goddammit!

 Wait, that reminded him…

 “Where are my weapons?” Baekhyun asked, tone taking on an icier edge. He could not help it, his weapons were important to him, and without them he felt a bit like he was missing a part of a limb.

 Baekhyun with his weapons was nearly invincible, and Baekhyun  _ without _ his weapons was… Pretty close to invincible as well, but nowhere near as close as when with his weapons. They were his  _ babies _ , very dear to him, and he swore, had anything happened to them-

 “Waiting for you in your room,” Phoenix answered, and Baekhyun’s eyebrows shot up his forehead.

 “Wow, were you really that sure that I’d join?” Baekhyun asked, and Phoenix gave a small smile.

 “No, but we prepared in case you would,” he answered, making Baekhyun snort.

 “Right, preparations, didn’t realize just how important it was to you guys…,” Baekhyun mumbled, looking around. “Can we go there now? I’d like to see them, make sure they were handled properly and all that, you know.”

 “Soon, there are more people than just me and Zephyr to meet,” Phoenix said, nodding in a direction. “Follow me.”

 “Oh, yes, sir!” Baekhyun murmured, biting his lower lip and taking great pleasure in how he could see Phoenix’s cute, large ears turn all red, shoulders squaring up a bit. Behind them, Zephyr laughed, and Baekhyun could hear him follow.

 Well, the more the merrier - or so they said.

 “This is our computer lab,” Phoenix said as he pulled a door open, and they stepped into a large room filled with computers and gadgets and other technological stuff - Baekhyun really was not that technologically advanced. As long as his computer worked and he could play on it, Baekhyun was happy.

 Sitting in a chair by one of the computers, legs pulled up and crossed in a way Baekhyun was pretty sure would get him a scolding (shoes on the furniture and all that), was a guy. Even though he was seated, he looked  _ shorter _ , and Baekhyun almost squealed.

 “Oh, hey everyone, lovely day, huh,” the guy said a bit distractedly, focused on one of the screens, as Baekhyun and the two towers walked over. He was looking at… Cute animal videos. Aw! “New recruit? Oh, joy!”

 “Ah,  _ finally _ someone of a more natural height!” Baekhyun exclaimed, dramatically draping himself over the back of the guy’s chair. “Almost thought I’d gotten kidnapped and taken to giant land!”

 “Nah, these guys are just unnaturally tall, I think it’s actually in the contract or something like that,” the guy said, lips spreading in a kittenish grin, hopping onto Baekhyun’s little humor train without so much as stuttering. “Of course, there are exceptions, and I think the exceptions are the real stars in all of this. So much awesome power packed into smaller packages - though my  _ package _ is above average, thank you very much!”

 “Oh, I think we’ll get along  _ splendidly _ , kitten,” Baekhyun ironically enough  _ purred _ . “A man of my own caliber, yes indeed, this will be so much fun!”

 “Feeling’s mutual, puppy,” kitten guy smirked, and just like that, an alliance was formed.

 “Oh god, what have we done…,” Zephyr whispered, a tinge of horror to his voice that had Baekhyun’s smirk widening.

 “Uh, this is Chen-” Phoenix started the introduction, just to be interrupted by kitten guy himself.

 “Kim Jongdae, codename Chen, at your service,” he said, holding out a hand that Baekhyun immediately took.

 “Byun Baekhyun, pleasure making your acquaintance,” Baekhyun responded. “Chen? How come they get all fancy mythological ones, and you get a normal one?”

 “Apparently nobody thought Zeus was good enough for me, neither was Thor, so Chen it became,” Jongdae said with a shrug and a sigh. “Old nickname, thought it could work.”

 “I’m sensing an electric theme here…,” Baekhyun slowly said, one eyebrow raising.

 “Danger, danger, high voltage!” Jongdae singsonged, before breaking down into cackles that lured a laughter out of Baekhyun as well. “No, but I’ve been told I can be  _ electrical _ , I’m pretty high energy, so it seemed fitting! Until everyone shut down my suggestions…”

 “Aw, I thought they were good suggestions,” Baekhyun said, pouting along with Jongdae.

 “This is extremely surreal and I’m  _ very _ uncomfortable,” Zephyr muttered, but Baekhyun ignored him as he patted Jongdae’s head.

 “I thought so too!” Jongdae whined, leaning into Baekhyun’s touch.

 “Uh, hello?”

 Baekhyun looked up at the new voice - only to groan and roll his eyes.

 “Ugh, not another one…,” he muttered, and the new addition frowned.

 “I'm… Sorry?” the new  _ tall _ man said, looking slightly uncomfortable, and Baekhyun almost felt bad.

 “Kai, this is Baekhyun, the new recruit,” Phoenix introduced, sounding rather tired by now. Must be hard work keeping such a big body going. Poor baby!

 “Ah, nice to meet you, hyung,” Kai said, giving a bow.

 After several seconds of just staring at Kai, Baekhyun looked up at Phoenix.

 “I like this one a lot!” he exclaimed, a touch of wonder in his voice. “Such a polite young man even with such a handsome face, I like him a lot!”

 Phoenix just rolled his eyes and sighed.

 “Yeah, Zephyr might seem like the baby, but once you get to know them you realize it's actually Kai,” Jongdae said, a fond smile on his lips even as Kai began to protest.

 “Aw, cute!” Baekhyun cooed, before switching over to his normal voice. “So, no mythological name for you either? What's your reason? I doubt it was megalomania.”

 Kai promptly looked down at Jongdae, who gasped and exclaimed that he was no megalomaniac, excuse you!, before looking up at Baekhyun and shaking his head.

 “He's too humble to take the name of a god,” Zephyr drawled, sounding bored - but he seemed to be the kind of person who appeared bored a lot of the time.

 He did not seem too concerned with his own well-being either, considering he merely raised an eyebrow as Kai sent him a withering glare that almost had  _ Baekhyun _ straightening up.

 “Please, children, no fighting in front of our guest!” Jongdae called out, having turned back to his animal videos. “I know you want to impress, but there’s surely plenty to go around!”

 Smirking, Baekhyun quirked an eyebrow, cocking a hip as he crossed his arms over his chest. Kai’s cheeks flushed, while Zephyr raised both eyebrows, and Phoenix turned his face upwards, as if asking the heaven’s why he was being tested like this. Very varied reactions, and very telling of the people present.

 From what Baekhyun had seen so far, this might actually be worth his time and maybe give him some amusement!


	3. Chapter 3

 “So, I hope you have all welcomed Baekhyun properly into our group,” Junmyeon started the meeting with, sending Baekhyun one of his soft smiles. Baekhyun had still not decided if it made him want to hug or punch the man, so for now he did neither. “WIth his joining, this group is now completed. Five people, all with their different qualifications and specialities, gathered in one place to offer their various knowledge to keep this country safe.”

 Zephyr raised a hand, as if they were sitting in a middle school classroom and not in a conference room in a secret task force facility. Nevertheless, Junmyeon patiently motioned for the third tower (Zephyr was apparently the youngest of them all), giving him permission to speak.

 “Remind me again why this country needs someone blowing buildings up to protect it?” Zephyr said, and Baekhyun stiffened in his seat.

 Oh, the little shit…

 “You blew something up?!” Kai exclaimed, looking over at Baekhyun with widened eyes.

 “Actually, in my defense, the bomb wasn’t  _ my _ fault!” Baekhyun said, giving a small, rather petulant shrug, and maybe there was a shadow of a pout over his lips. “I might have had something little to do with it, but it wasn’t like I rigged it or anything, I just accidentally initiated it… Not my fault that every lousy, low-level baddie feels this  _ need _ to have a self-destruct plan, and that it usually involves bombs!”

 “Was there a big, red button as well?” Jongdae asked, elbow propped on the table and chin balanced on his hand. He seemed rather amused by it all, and Baekhyun quickly latched onto that.

 “Nah, not this one, but I have been to places that actually had one,” Baekhyun said, leaning back in his chair with a lopsided grin. “Probably the most stupid and obvious thing ever, and the reason why low-level baddies don’t come back. They blow all of their research and information up because they think that it’s cool to have a big, red button wired to a shitload of explosives!”

 “And I’m guessing they don’t have any backup servers hidden away either,” Jongdae said with a sigh, shaking his head.

 “Baekhyun isn’t here because of the various explosions he’s been involved in,” Junmyeon said, voice raised but still gentle, quickly interrupting the discussion. “I won’t deny that having someone who has a history of  _ accidentally _ setting off bombs to take various organisations down isn’t great, but that is not why he’s here.”

 The room fell into silence, as if expecting Junmyeon to continue. Baekhyun had a clue to why, but he was not going to speak up without knowing for certain, so he stayed silent as well.

 “So… Why?” Zephyr finally asked, breaking the silence.

 “Because he’s a very skillful unarmed combatant,” Phoenix, for some reason, answered. Noticing Baekhyun’s shocked stare, he sighed. “I actually read  _ some _ of your file…”

 “Ah, so that part was in the beginning of my dick-thick file, huh?” Baekhyun smirked, taking pleasure in Phoenix’s reddening ears, but not as much pleasure in Kai’s choking. “Sorry, sweetie, his words, not mine!”

 Throughout it all, Zephyr had sat and stared with squinted eyes at Baekhyun, as if to try to see into his soul and uncover all of his secrets. The intensity of it had Baekhyun start to feel a bit naked, and he had to hold back from covering his important parts with his hands.

 “No, nu-uh, that can’t be it, must be the explosions,” Zephyr exclaimed as he  _ finally _ looked away, crossing his arms over his chest as he leaned back and shook his head. “He’s too small, doesn’t work, I refuse to believe it.”

 “It’s not the size that matters, baby, but how you use it,” Baekhyun purred, winking as Zephyr looked over at him. “You should know that.”

 This time Kai snorted instead of choked, and it felt like a small victory to Baekhyun. Zephyr did not seem to appreciate it though, as he turned to kick at Kai, only hitting his chair.

 “Phoenix is right, Baekhyun is here because of his mastery of unarmed combat,” Junmyeon spoke up, once more interrupting as they started to go off topic. He really had to have the patience of a saint, having to deal with their shit… Baekhyun did not envy him the boss position!

 But Baekhyun did very much enjoy the compliments thrown his way, bashfully waving it away and probably not fooling anyone in the room considering the giant fucking grin on his face.

 “And with that addition, we now have a full team, ready to take on whatever may come our way,” Junmyeon continued, placing his papers down on the table, and Baekhyun could not help but wonder what kind of papers they were since he found it so important to always bring them around. Or were they new papers every time Baekhyun saw Junmyeon? So many questions! “For now, I want you to get to know each other and get closer, okay?”

 “As we’ve been doing for the last few weeks,” Jongdae drawled, holding up a hand as Junmyeon opened his mouth. “Yes, I know, ‘to become a team’, I’m not complaining about being able to just laze around more. I’m fine with that,  _ more _ than fine. I’m just wondering why we’re still not moving, when you hurried so much with setting this whole thing up.”

 “There’s a lot of details to figure out,” Junmyeon explained as he pulled a chair out and sat down. “Having the best possible team as quickly as possible was always the priority, no matter if we managed to get enough information or not to move out immediately. The more time you get to get to know each other, the better.”

 “So we’re supposed to get to know each other, but I won’t learn any names?” Baekhyun piped up.

 “They’re protecting their identity in case it doesn’t work out, and you decide to leave,” Junmyeon answered. “You’re not the only one with a questionable background, they’re doing what they need to do to protect themselves, because names hold a lot of power. But the more you get to know them, the more inclined they will be to give you their names. Some already do.”

 Baekhyun glanced over at Jongdae, who winked right back at him.

 “Of course, the fact that I digitally do no exist helps keeping me a bit braver than the rest,” Jongdae said with a shrug.

 “Ah, so you’re the tech guy, huh, explains why we found you in the computer lab,” Baekhyun said, rubbing his chin as he looked away from Jongdae and towards the rest. “Tech guy and unarmed guy, what are we left with then… Probably a weapon specialist, that’s sort of a given. That still leaves two open spaces, though…”

 “Get to know them, and find out,” Junmyeon said with a smile, before picking his papers up, tapping them against the table, and then standing. “Meeting over! I suggest you get some sleep, and then tomorrow you’ll start training, Baekhyun.”

 “Aye aye, sir!” Baekhyun chirped, giving a mock salute that had Junmyeon give a lopsided smile and shake his head.

 As soon as Junmyeon had exited the conference room, Baekhyun swiveled his chair to face Phoenix, pinning him with a stare.

 “May I  _ please _ get to my room and my weapons now?” Baekhyun asked. “There’s no one else for me to meet, right?”

 “No, there’s not,” Phoenix said with a sigh, before getting out of his seat. “Come on, then, and I’ll show you…”

 “Don’t do anything I wouldn’t, the soreness would be a bitch to handle during training,” Jongdae drawled as Baekhyun got up as well, making to follow Phoenix.

 “Daddy said I wasn’t allowed to do him,” Baekhyun sniffed, turning and walking backwards so that he could give Jongdae the most exaggerated pout he could physically muster. Spinning around, he almost face-planted into Phoenix’s back. “Whoa there, boy, are you okay?”

 Not turning around, ears  _ glowing _ red, Phoenix took a deep breath and let it out, before he nodded and started to move. Exasperation? Annoyance? Embarrassment? Baekhyun could not help but wonder what it was…

 “Daddy?” Zephyr asked as Baekhyun and Phoenix exited the room.

 “Think about it, stupid, I’m sure you can figure it out,” was the last thing Baekhyun heard - voice surprisingly sounding like Kai.

 Huh. It was surprise after surprise with Kai; like an advent calendar, you open a door and get something new every time! How charming!

 Silence reigned as Phoenix led Baekhyun through corridors, heading in a new direction from where they had gone before. Pursing his lips and moving them back and forth in boredom, Baekhyun then made a kissy-mouth, pulling in air to make chirpy noises. Looking over his shoulder, Phoenix raised both eyebrows, turning back forwards after Baekhyun flashed him a quick grin.

 Clasping his hands behind his back, Baekhyun began to chew on his lower lip, before releasing it again and clicking his tongue.

 “Oh my god!” Phoenix exclaimed, whirling around to get all up in Baekhyun’s space. “ _ What _ do you want?!”

 “What, me? Want something?” Baekhyun asked, pointing at himself as he blinked his eyes. “Why do you think I want something?”

 “Because you keep making annoying noises!” Phoenix exclaimed, pinching his nose and closing his eyes as he seemed to try to calm himself down. “Just- tell me what it is, don’t try to bullshit me.”

 Baekhyun  _ was _ pretty close to continuing playing dumb, because it was fun to get on Phoenix’s nerves, but in the end he had mercy on the tower.

 “Okay, what’s your deal?” Baekhyun asked, crossing his arms over his chest, motioning with one hand in a circle as Phoenix shot him a confused look. “Your speciality, what you’re good at, why you’re a part of this team, whatever. I know I won’t get a name, but your skill is okay, right?”

 Rolling his eyes, Phoenix once more turned forwards and began to walk, making Baekhyun startle and jog to catch up.

 “You’re so impatient, Byun. Just wait until tomorrow and you’ll get an answer to your question.”

 “But waiting is so boring!” Baekhyun complained, a whine to his voice.

 “Not my problem,” Phoenix said with a shrug, but there was something in his voice that hinted to him  _ enjoying _ Baekhyun’s pain. “Come on, hurry up, shorty, we’re soon there.”

 “Shorty?” Baekhyun snorted. “Gotta step up your game to get on my level, boo!”

 “When you get to my height level, I’ll get on your nickname level,” Phoenix shot back, and now Baekhyun was  _ sure _ that the taller was smiling.

 “The  _ audacity _ !” Baekhyun gasped, dramatically placing a hand on his chest. “Not everyone can be freakishly tall, babycakes! Some of us got to be at the average height of the rest of the country, you know!”

 “So you’re admitting to being average?” Phoenix hummed, sending an amused look over his shoulder.

 “Oh, look at you go,” Baekhyun chuckled, grin appearing on his lips. “You’re not half bad at this, 

Gummy Bear, I’ve got to admit… A bit of a shame it goes out the window as soon as you’re flustered, but it’s so cute seeing your ears light up anyway.”

 Said ears once more turned red, and Phoenix clenched his jaw as he came to a stop. He really did not like having the blush pointed out, or being flustered, huh?

 “We’re here,” Phoenix unceremoniously said, pointing towards a non-descript door.

 Eyebrows raising, Baekhyun turned to look at the door. Had he not had it pointed out for him, he would probably not even have noticed it being there. Which was honestly pretty great - why would you go for the blank doors when looking through the place for people to kill?

 “So… Is there a key? Or is only lockable from the inside or something like that?” Baekhyun asked, glancing over at Phoenix just in time to see him throw something. Instinctively, Baekhyun’s hand shot out to snatch the object out of the air, fingers wrapping around something metallic.

 Bringing his hand down, Baekhyun opened it and looked down to find a key lying on his palm. It was connected to a keyring, a keyring that also contained a silver ring with blue accents, and a triangle pointing down in the middle. Recognizing the symbol, Baekhyun could not help but snort, a crooked smile on his lips.

 “Wow,  _ nerd _ ,” he chuckled, holding the keyring accessory up for Phoenix to see. “Of course you’re a nerd, just makes you even cuter, sweetums!”

 Phoenix’s eyes widened dramatically, a lot like when Baekhyun had unlocked the cuffs, eyes darting between Baekhyun’s face, and the keyring in his hand.

 “You recognize it?!” Phoenix exclaimed, almost tripping over his words.

 “Of course I do?” Baekhyun answered, frowning. “It’s Iron Man’s arc reactor. Not the palladium one, but the other, right?”

 “Y-yes…,” Phoenix stammered, looking rather shell-shocked. “Nobody’s recognized them so far…”

 “You give nerdy keyrings to everyone?” Baekhyun answered, grin widening and voice filled with amusement. “Of course you do. What’s yours?”

 Pulling out his own keychain - that held quite the few keys, Baekhyun noticed - Phoenix wordlessly held it out for Baekhyun to see.

 “Deadpool, huh? A good choice, I have to say,” Baekhyun said with a nod, approving. “Not as good as Iron Man, but we can’t all have Iron Man now, can we!”

 “You really are an enigma…,” Phoenix muttered, shaking his head. “If you need anything there’s an intercom in your room, somebody will come fetch you for breakfast around seven tomorrow, and then we start training at eight. Questions?”

 “Only one,” Baekhyun said as he crossed his arms over his chest and leaned against the wall next to his door. “Why does it feel like you’re running away from me?”

 “Maybe because I am,” Phoenix mumbled so silently that Baekhyun barely even heard him. “I feel half exhausted, I think I need a break…”

 “Don’t worry, I get easier to handle the more used you get to me,” Baekhyun snickered, throwing in a wink just for the hell of it. “You should probably get some rest now, you’re supposed to deal with me the  _ entire _ day tomorrow!”

 “Oh, how will I ever survive,” Phoenix drawled, rolling his eyes.

 “Snarky ain’t that attractive, baby boy!” Baekhyun called out as Phoenix began to walk away, and Baekhyun turned to unlock his door.

 “You shouldn’t tell lies, Baekhyun-ah!”

 Baekhyun’s laughter echoed down the hallway, following Phoenix, as Baekhyun opened the door to his new room and stepped inside, still chucking to himself.

 The room looked about what you would expect it to - a bed, a desk with a chair, a wardrobe. Another door led into a tiny bathroom with only a toilet and a washbasin. Did that mean shared showers? That could be interesting…

 Heading back into the room, Baekhyun went over to the bed. On top of the cover laid a sheet, and on top of that sheet laid Baekhyun’s weapons. Letting out a contented sigh, Baekhyun knelt in front of the bed and let his fingers trail across his babies.

 Head tilting to the side and features forming a frown, Baekhyun reached out to pick up one of his Five-sevens, looking it over. It had been cleaned, without a doubt, which had Baekhyun’s frown deepening.

 He did  _ not _ like having other people touching his weapons. Not at all.

 Quickly disassembling the gun with practiced moves, Baekhyun carefully looked over each and every part, before doing the same to the other gun as well. They seemed to not have been tampered with… But he was going to have a chat with whoever the weapon specialist was tomorrow, without a doubt.

 Reassembling everything, Baekhyun put the guns by the side of his pillow, before slipping the other weapons into their various places. Feeling satisfied and a bit more safe, Baekhyun laid down on the bed, arms beneath his head as he curled up on his side. His head was still aching a little, and a lot had happened today. A lot of adrenaline had been drained as well, and he was just  _ tired. _

 So why not sleep?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am utterly and completely exhausted, not my best work, but we're moving forwards!  
> *sends fingerhearts Airi's way*

**Author's Note:**

> I LOVE YOU <3


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